I'm not usually one to air my dirty laundry for everyone to see online. But I think I need to change that, starting now. You see, earlier I talked to Neks.
He had shown me a chat log from IMVU of xia's spontaneous adventures in finding a sub, interview and all. Now, I know having two pets myself, I should be okay with it, but I expected the same courtesy I had shown him. Like... Being told about it? A warning? Him NOT to allude to us breaking up during the interview? So I flew off the handle. Words were exchanged, and they weren't entirely flattering in regards to him. He had kept bitching about how I woke him up "only to yell at him" and I got nowhere conversationally. Partially because alot of me didn't WANT to go anywhere... So now I'm sitting downstairs with mom, confused and lonely. And mad. But not as mad as earlier.
I hit him with a pillow several times. But that's besides any point whatsoever.
I asked him if we should break up. He barely even reacted. As much as it would break my heart, I think this on-going blankness interspersed with arguing is even more heartbreaking in the long run. We (rarely) have fun, but the times are too few and far between to weigh that against a potential split. I'm trying to make this work, I really am. I'm biting my tongue at the bitterness, but it's getting to be ridiculous.
Ah, angst.
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